Well, that has happened quickly.
It is amazing when you actually decide on making a change – how quickly things can start to manifest for you.
I wrote about it here. And after I hit publish, I consciously went through my social media zoo and did what I said I would do. I un-noised it. De-activated my twitter account and made a mental note of creating more quiet.
Ethan and I lived in a little unit many,many,many years ago on our own, I really struggled with quiet and being alone. My own company was something that I didn’t really know, I loved the chaos of being busy. The chaos of people, the dramas. Even though I loved it, it was completely and utterly draining. So slowly I made an effort to actually embrace the quiet and calm. I attempted to meditate as often as I could. Not having any idea on how to do it – I reverted back to my years of dance training where I would do slow stretches of the muscles for about 30 minutes every day. It calmed the mind. It calmed my soul. Such a small ritual but it gave a HUGE impact. Those were the days where I wrote every single day. And writing wasn’t hard. I’m going to start doing this again.
I also have missed the pen & paper. In my day job, I am behind my computer for 9 hours every day. My phone is where I make up my shopping lists, pay the bills and answer emails. Pen & paper slows it down. So I grabbed a pad and wrote.
Now, there wasn’t enlightened, totally amazing things that went on the page – but I wrote down what I wanted and needed so that my goals ie this book of mine, and how I am going to re-fill my cup.
And I closed my eyes and thought back to the time in my little unit – where even though it was the one of the hardest times of my life – I discovered peace.
Peace. I’m going to re-introduce it back into my life. Because, through calm and peace, the noise will naturally flitter away.
So here’s what I’m doing:
- I am going to start meditating every day. I am not sure how that will look but I’m really excited to see where it will take me.
- I am going to get all my crystals and oils out again and see how that may assist me.
- I am going to write my intentions on paper
- I am going to give myself more slack and be kinder to myself
- I am going to listen more, care more and be cared for more.
- I am going to remember to smile at the face of anxiety.
- I am going to laugh. A lot. I have missed laughing.
- I am. Going to be every day grateful for what I do have in my life. For the amazing children and man who are on my side, by my side every single day. I am, so lucky to have such beautiful friends that truly all are one in a million. I am grateful that I have a home, we have food, we have jobs – there is so much to be grateful for.
The final bit that I wrote on that pad was when and how I’m going to get to where I’m wanting to get to.
It was completely unrealistic of me to think that 2016 was going to be where I would finish my book. How fantastic that I had made that decision in December 2015, but seriously Cheryl?? Remember, be kind to yourself.
So, book, you are going to be a journey. I’m hoping the journey will be that I will be writing the last paragraph of you in Lembongan overlooking the ocean bay sipping on a cold smoothie with the sun streaming down on me. Book, this is where you will be completed. I wrote it down. So with that intention – I am now going to making this happen.
I am also going to get my name and writing out there. World! Look out!
My dad actually sparked my decision about writing this book back in December where he called said “ You have a book in you, it will be a bestseller!” and he called again and said the same thing.
So I’m feeling good today. Really good. Even a little lighter. I’m not going to even share this post on the Bliss & Mayhem Facebook page. I’m putting here, on my blog – which has been instrumental in me finding my word groove again. For you all, and for me.
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